Thursday, January 31, 2008

January 31, 2008

Welcome back, Lost!

Kate’s mother: Coffee, pie, both?
Kate: How ‘bout a beer?

Wednesday, January 30, 2008

January 30, 2008

Daily Show

John Hodgman: The Morlocks are loathsome underground dwellers who eat human flesh … and don’t really like pie.

Tuesday, January 29, 2008

January 29, 2008

Heather Havrilesky for

Gimme a piece of that metrosexual pie.

Monday, January 28, 2008

January 28, 2008

Special Topics in Calamity Physics, by Marisha Pessl

p. 109: The girls were fraternal twins, Eliara and Georgia Hatchett. With curly auburn hair, stout frames, shepherd's-pie potbellies and alehouse complexions, they resembled two oily portraits of King Henry VIII ...

Sunday, January 27, 2008

January 27, 2008

Adam Gopnick, in The New Yorker

(Re: artist Joseph Cornell): In his diaries and letters, while he is knocked sideways by prints and poems and pies and sexy waitresses and melodies, I can’t find a single occasion when he is overwhelmed by a painting …

Saturday, January 26, 2008

January 26, 2008

Gilmore Girls

Lorelai: Hmm … Muffin bottom pie … sounds dirty.

Friday, January 25, 2008

January 25, 2008

King of the Hill

Peggy: Honey, did you try the capers with your fruit pies yet?

Bobby: That was a real disappointment. Let’s not talk about it.

Wednesday, January 23, 2008

January 24, 2008


Becky: You should have your own little pie shop somewhere - somewhere they could really use a little pie shop. Like Europe ... or New Jersey.

Happy National Pie Day!

Perform Random Acts of Pieness

Tuesday, January 22, 2008

January 22, 2008

Pushing Daisies

Ned: I’m not a detective. I make pies.

Monday, January 21, 2008

January 21, 2008

Dagenham Dave, by Morrissey

Head in the clouds and a mouthful of pie
Head in the clouds – everybody loves him; I see why
… Dagenham Dave

Sunday, January 20, 2008

January 20, 2008

The Simpsons

Lisa: Noble idiot, bring in the pie.

Wednesday, January 16, 2008

January 19, 2008

South Park

Cartman: I would never let a woman kick my ass. If she tried anything, I’d be like, Eh! You get your bitch ass back in the kitchen and make me some pie.

January 18, 2008


Lorne: Blessings and moon pies, brethren and sistren.

January 17, 2008

Pushing Daisies

Vivian: Beaver Boy did say he was a pie maker. I imagine he gives lots of people pie.

Olive: Beaver Boy’s a pie maker?

January 16, 2008

The Colbert Report

Colbert: Some good old American comfort food … a hot dog pie.

January 15, 2008

A Winter’s Tale, by Mark Helprin

p. 215: Even Mrs. Gamely, a paragon of conservation, gave freely of her stores and participated in the ruthless cooking of a dozen feasts and the fearless baking of a hundred pies.

Tuesday, January 15, 2008

January 15, 2008

Sex and the City

Miranda: Why do I have a rolling pin?

Cleaning Lady: It’s for you to make pies.

Miranda: Un-hunh.

Cleaning Lady: It’s good for woman to make pies.

Monday, January 14, 2008

January 14, 2008

The Tale of Peter Rabbit, by Beatrix Potter

Mother: … don’t go into Mr. McGregor’s garden: your Father had an accident there; he was put in a pie by Mrs. McGregor.

Sunday, January 13, 2008

January 13, 2008


Conrad: Heylia, break out that pie you made last night. The white lady’s havin’ a time of it here. C’mon.

Heylia: Tell her get her skinny ass in here and get her own damn pie. Slave days is over.

Saturday, January 12, 2008

January 12, 2008

Texas Monthly headline

The Pies of Texas are Upon You

Friday, January 11, 2008

January 11, 2008

Taxi Driver

Travis Bickle: May twenty-sixth, four o’clock pm. I took Betsy to Child’s Coffee Shop on Columbus Circle. I had black coffee and apple pie with a slice of melted yellow cheese … I think that was a good selection.

Wednesday, January 9, 2008

January 10, 2008

The Office (British)

David: You’re not lookin’ at the whole pie, Jenny. Wernham-Hogg is one big pie … and if they’ve let me in charge of that one big pie I’ll be in charge of the … the pie and … the people are the fruit –

Jenny: I don’t have time for the pie thing, David.

David: The pie thing … No, you don’t want it..

January 9, 2008

Barack Obama, on NPR's Morning Edition

When I talk about change, I'm not talking about some gauzy, pie-in-the-sky change.

Sunday, January 6, 2008

January 8, 2008

Buffy the Vampire Slayer

Buffybot: That’ll put marzipan in your pieplate, bingo!

Spike (to Willow) What’s with the dadaism, Red?

Tara: Yeah, she says that pie thing every time she stakes a vamp now.

January 7, 2008

The Simpsons

Dan Rather (re: the New Hampshire primaries): As the day of the primary nears, this race is as wide open as a hobo's mouth at a pie-flinging contest.

January 6, 2008

Times Journalist, 1902

Pie is the food of the heroic. No pie-eating people can ever be vanquished.

Saturday, January 5, 2008

January 5, 2008

Gilmore Girls

Luke: From now on … every day is a nice day for pie!

Friday, January 4, 2008

January 4, 2008


Laura: Coffee and pie.

Brendan: Coffee and pie, oh my?

Laura: But you didn’t hear it from me.

Thursday, January 3, 2008

January 3, 2008

The Simpsons

Mr. Burns: Where’d you get that pie?

Homer: Windowsill.

Wednesday, January 2, 2008

January 2, 2008

My Name is Earl

Earl: Gettin’ free pie in a world without free pie was pretty cool.

Tuesday, January 1, 2008

January 1, 2008

Pushing Daisies

Ned: Candy might be sweet, but it’s a traveling carnival blowing through town. Pie is home. People always come home.