Monday, March 31, 2008
March 31, 2008 - Major League Opening Day
Harry Reasoner: Statistics are to baseball what a flaky crust is to Mom’s apple pie.
Sunday, March 30, 2008
March 30, 2008
Nip/Tuck
Evetta: Where I come from I don’t get lipo to attract a man … I eat another cherry pie and put more junk in my trunk
Evetta: Where I come from I don’t get lipo to attract a man … I eat another cherry pie and put more junk in my trunk
Saturday, March 29, 2008
March 29, 2008
Jane Eyre, by Charlotte Bronte
Jane: … when there was no time to prepare a regular dinner, which often happened, she would give us a large piece of cold pie, or a thick slice of bread and cheese, and this we carried away with us to the wood … and dined sumptuously.
Jane: … when there was no time to prepare a regular dinner, which often happened, she would give us a large piece of cold pie, or a thick slice of bread and cheese, and this we carried away with us to the wood … and dined sumptuously.
Friday, March 28, 2008
March 28, 2008
Adam Gopnick, writing on Joseph Cornell in The New Yorker:
He sat in cafeterias drinking coffee and eating pie and staring at girls and going to the movies and reading Mallarme …
He sat in cafeterias drinking coffee and eating pie and staring at girls and going to the movies and reading Mallarme …
Thursday, March 27, 2008
March 27, 2008
Pushing Daisies
Ned: I don’t think someone purposefully damaged our sign to read “Pie Ho.”
Ned: I don’t think someone purposefully damaged our sign to read “Pie Ho.”
Wednesday, March 26, 2008
Tuesday, March 25, 2008
March 25, 2008
ER
Pratt: Fatty foods bring out the pain.
Patient: I didn’t even eat dinner. I just had some pie.
Pratt: How much pie?
Patient: You know … a pie.
Pratt: Fatty foods bring out the pain.
Patient: I didn’t even eat dinner. I just had some pie.
Pratt: How much pie?
Patient: You know … a pie.
Monday, March 24, 2008
March 24, 2008
Arrested Development
Lindsay (running from a woman they’ve mistaken for their grandmother): Go! Go! It’s not her! Drop the photo album! We’re not in the photo album.
Maeby: Drop the pie!
Lindsay (running from a woman they’ve mistaken for their grandmother): Go! Go! It’s not her! Drop the photo album! We’re not in the photo album.
Maeby: Drop the pie!
Sunday, March 23, 2008
March 23, 2008 - Happy Easter!
Melanie: Bunnies are rodents. I don't like them.
Hallie: But they taste amazing. I had bunny rabbit pie the other day.
Hallie: But they taste amazing. I had bunny rabbit pie the other day.
Saturday, March 22, 2008
March 22, 2008
King of the Hill
Bobby: Someday, someone’s gonna make the world’s largest fruit pie and the next day, I’ll get in the Guinness Book of World Records for eating it.
Bobby: Someday, someone’s gonna make the world’s largest fruit pie and the next day, I’ll get in the Guinness Book of World Records for eating it.
Friday, March 21, 2008
Thursday, March 20, 2008
March 20, 2008
Committed
Jay: Food can be news – like that series he just did on pies. I had no idea there were so many pies.
Jolene: What I mean is, he wants to be on the front lines shooting current events unfolding, and all these pies and soufflés have really been getting him down.
Jay: Food can be news – like that series he just did on pies. I had no idea there were so many pies.
Jolene: What I mean is, he wants to be on the front lines shooting current events unfolding, and all these pies and soufflés have really been getting him down.
Wednesday, March 19, 2008
March 19, 2008
Waitress
Dawn: Would you also make me your “Falling In Love Chocolate Mousse Pie”? That is my favorite.
Dawn: Would you also make me your “Falling In Love Chocolate Mousse Pie”? That is my favorite.
Tuesday, March 18, 2008
March 18, 2008
Waitress
Dawn: The first guy that pays any attention to me in years and it turns out to be the mad stalking elf. I’m tellin’ you Jenna, your makeup job was too good – and your magic love pie.
Dawn: The first guy that pays any attention to me in years and it turns out to be the mad stalking elf. I’m tellin’ you Jenna, your makeup job was too good – and your magic love pie.
Monday, March 17, 2008
March 17, 2008 - Eat pie for St. Pat's Day!
Harold and the Purple Crayon, by Crocket Johnson
The sandy beach reminded Harold of picnics. And the thought of picnics made him hungry. So he laid out a nice simple picnic lunch. There was nothing but pie. But there were all nine kinds of pie that Harold liked best. When Harold finished his picnic there was quite a lot left. He hated to see so much delicious pie go to waste. So Harold left a very hungry moose and a deserving porcupine to finish it up.
The sandy beach reminded Harold of picnics. And the thought of picnics made him hungry. So he laid out a nice simple picnic lunch. There was nothing but pie. But there were all nine kinds of pie that Harold liked best. When Harold finished his picnic there was quite a lot left. He hated to see so much delicious pie go to waste. So Harold left a very hungry moose and a deserving porcupine to finish it up.
Sunday, March 16, 2008
March 16, 2008
Saturday Night Live
Target Lady: Double whammy! (holds up sweatpants and a box of Nilla wafers): I can't wait to sew these footholes shut, fill 'em with potpourri and hang them from the rafters in my attic and then have my friends over to smell it and serve them pie!
Target Lady: Double whammy! (holds up sweatpants and a box of Nilla wafers): I can't wait to sew these footholes shut, fill 'em with potpourri and hang them from the rafters in my attic and then have my friends over to smell it and serve them pie!
Saturday, March 15, 2008
March 15, 2008
Weeds
Andy: It sucks when the pie gets eaten right in front of you and you helped make the pie.
Silas: What pie?
Andy: It’s a metaphorical pie.
Andy: It sucks when the pie gets eaten right in front of you and you helped make the pie.
Silas: What pie?
Andy: It’s a metaphorical pie.
Friday, March 14, 2008
March 14, 2008
A House by the Sea, by Joann Ryder
We’d walk in the rain,
Those seals and I
Till we’d stop for a slice
Of fish-eyed pie
We’d walk in the rain,
Those seals and I
Till we’d stop for a slice
Of fish-eyed pie
Thursday, March 13, 2008
March 13, 2008
Winter's Tale, by Mark Helprin
p. 383, Mrs. Gamely: “… so many new and wonderful words being generated, that the storehouses and closets are overflowing. We are tub-flooded with neologisms, smoked fish, and fruit pies.” She had even enclosed in the letter itself a very thin and very delicious cherry pie.
p. 383, Mrs. Gamely: “… so many new and wonderful words being generated, that the storehouses and closets are overflowing. We are tub-flooded with neologisms, smoked fish, and fruit pies.” She had even enclosed in the letter itself a very thin and very delicious cherry pie.
Wednesday, March 12, 2008
March 12, 2008
Law and Order
Cutter (playing one brother off another): It’s the Emerson brothers bake-off. First pie out of the oven gets the prize.
Cutter (playing one brother off another): It’s the Emerson brothers bake-off. First pie out of the oven gets the prize.
Tuesday, March 11, 2008
March 11, 2008
Pushing Daisies
Vivian: Pies for breakfast always remind me of mother.
Lily: Vermouth always reminds me of mother.
Vivian: Pies for breakfast always remind me of mother.
Lily: Vermouth always reminds me of mother.
Monday, March 10, 2008
March 10, 2008
Friends
Monica: I haven’t won anything since the sixth grade.
Chandler: Pie-eating contest?
Monica: I haven’t won anything since the sixth grade.
Chandler: Pie-eating contest?
Sunday, March 9, 2008
March 9, 2008 - My birthday
The Office (American)
Creed: Today is actually my birthday and I wanna pick the cake.
Jim: What do you want?
Creed: I want pie. I want peach pie.
Jim: You want birthday pie?
Creed: Or a nice cobbler.
Creed: Today is actually my birthday and I wanna pick the cake.
Jim: What do you want?
Creed: I want pie. I want peach pie.
Jim: You want birthday pie?
Creed: Or a nice cobbler.
Saturday, March 8, 2008
Friday, March 7, 2008
March 7, 2008
Saturday Night Live
Nathan: (Chris Kattan): Karen, would you – would you chew my pie for me?
Karen (Juliana Margulies): Nathan, I would love to chew this apple pie for you.
Kattan: Yaay! Yaay! Apple pie!
Nathan: (Chris Kattan): Karen, would you – would you chew my pie for me?
Karen (Juliana Margulies): Nathan, I would love to chew this apple pie for you.
Kattan: Yaay! Yaay! Apple pie!
Thursday, March 6, 2008
March 6, 2008
Gilmore Girls
Emily: I have no interest in having a neighbor waltz in with a pie … I would kill myself – and the neighbor.
Emily: I have no interest in having a neighbor waltz in with a pie … I would kill myself – and the neighbor.
Wednesday, March 5, 2008
March 5, 2008 - Hillary's still in it
The Daily Show
Dan Rather (on election results): She ran away with it like a hobo with a sweet potato pie.
Dan Rather (on election results): She ran away with it like a hobo with a sweet potato pie.
Tuesday, March 4, 2008
Monday, March 3, 2008
March 3, 2008
Pushing Daisies
Chuck: But … I don’t know anything about you since you were nine.
Ned: It’s pretty much I bake pies and wake the dead. I live a very sheltered life.
Chuck: But … I don’t know anything about you since you were nine.
Ned: It’s pretty much I bake pies and wake the dead. I live a very sheltered life.
Sunday, March 2, 2008
Saturday, March 1, 2008
March 1, 2008
Never Been Kissed
Josie: You know what’s a weird word? Fork. Oh my God, someone ate my entire pie. I don’t know how that happened.
Josie: You know what’s a weird word? Fork. Oh my God, someone ate my entire pie. I don’t know how that happened.
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