December 31, 2008

Deep Thoughts, by Jack Handey

When you die, if you get a choice between going to regular heaven or pie heaven, choose pie heaven. It might be a trick, but if it’s not, ummm boy.

December 30, 2008

Waitress

Jenna’s Mother’s Song:

Baby don’t you cry
Gonna make a pie
Gonna make a pie
With a heart in the middle

Baby don’t be blue
Gonna make for you
Gonna make a pie
With a heart in the middle

Gonna be a pie from Heaven above
Gonna be filled with strawberry love …

December 29, 2008

The Simpsons

Homer: Boy, that pie looks good.

Waitress: Open your gullet, you human blob.

December 28, 2008

Pushing Daisies

Chuck: I baked antidepressants into her pies.

December 27, 2008

Winter's Tale, by Mark Helprin

p. 524 Hardesty: "How fast can you load that thing?"

Mrs. Gamely: "Fast enough to keep a pie plate in the air."

December 26, 2008

Scrubs



JD: You're a pie racist!

December 25, 2008 - Christmas Pie

Swan among the Indians: life of James G. Swan, 1818-1900; based upon Swan's hitherto unpublished diaries and journals, by Lucile Saunders McDonald

On December 25, 1861, three "Boston men" sat down to Christmas dinner in the trading post established four years earlier at the edge of the Makah Indian reservation, Washington Territory, USA.

The traditional holiday was a welcome break from the unloading and distribution of a shipment of goods promised to the Makah by the treaty they had signed in 1855. James Swan, a periodic resident in Neah Bay, had, in the absence of the trader, prepared a feast of roast goose and duck stew, presenting for dessert a mince pie made from whale meat. The Indians, he wrote later, had brought him a fresh piece of whale meat months earlier that looked every bit as good as red beef. He had boiled it and cut it finely, adding chopped apples and wild cranberries, raisins, currants, salt, nutmeg, cloves, allspice, cinnamon, and brown sugar. After packing it into a ten-gallon stone jar, he had added a quart of New England rum and sealed it for future use.

Would the traditional mince pie, he worried, be welcomed if the diners learned it was made from whale? Yankee mincemeat was made from domestic animals or venison. His fears were soon dispelled. The small portions he had cautiously served were quickly downed and second helpings demanded by all.

Click here for an extended history of mincemeat pie (courtesy of What's Cooking America) -- it's delicious!

December 24, 2008 - Christmas Eve Pie

The entire Bible story -- told by pies.

December 23, 2008 - Christmas Pie

Home for the Holidays

I met a man who lives in Tennessee
He was headin' for Pennsylvania
and some home made pumpkin pie.
From Pennsylvania, folks are travelin' down
To Dixie's sunny shore.
From Atlantic to Pacific,
Gee, the traffic is terrific.

December 22, 2008 - Christmas Pie

Rockin' Around the Christmas Tree

Rockin' around the Christmas tree
Let the Christmas spirit ring
Later we'll have some pumpkin pie
And we'll do some caroling.

December 21 - Winter Solstice Pie!

Enjoy! Merry Christmas and best wishes of the season from everyone here at Pie of the Day!

The Christians and the Pagans, by Dar Williams

The food was great, the tree plugged in,
the meal had gone without a hitch
Till Timmy turned to Amber and said,
"Is it true that you're a witch?"
His mom jumped up and said,
"The pies are burning," and she hit the kitchen

And it was Jane who spoke,
she said, "It's true, your cousin's not a Christian
But we love trees, we love the snow,
the friends we have, the world we share
And you find magic from your God,
and we find magic everywhere"

So the Christians and the Pagans sat together at the table
Finding faith and common ground the best that they were able
And where does magic come from? I think magic's in the learning
Cause now when Christians sit with Pagans only pumpkin pies are burning

December 20, 2008 - Christmas Pie

Antique Christmas ABC Book:

L is for Luggage
By quick train despatched

M is for Mince Pies
All sugar and plums

N is for Nutcrackers
For saving our gums

December 19, 2008

Gilmore Girls

Black sheep daughter of Harvard alums: … stupid manager made me cover for Fiona today … that girl’s a major piecrust.

December 18, 2008

The Simpsons

Lisa stands outside her first Mensa meeting holding a dessert.

Voice from inside: Lisa Simpson, are you ready to go on a voyage of self-discovery?

Lisa: Yes.

Voice: Is that a pie … or a quiche?

December 17, 2008

Pushing Daisies

Chuck: There’s a traffic jam of pies waiting to exit into the oven.

December 16, 2008

Waitress

Jenna: “Baby Screamin’ Its Head Off In the Middle a’ the Night and Ruinin’ My Life Pie.”

December 15, 2008

From wikiquote.com

Piphilology is the practice of writing such that the number of letters in each word corresponds to a digit of pi. Words of at least eleven letters correspond to two digits of pi. Some examples of piphilology are:

Pie. I wish I could determine pi. "Eureka!" cried the great inventor.
"Christmas pudding, Christmas pie, is the problem's very center!" (Also found starting with "How I wish I could recollect pi.")

December 14, 2008

Special Topics in Calamity Physics, by Marisha Pessl

p. 102: I especially detested the occasions Hanna referred to Jade’s beauty, as she turned into the sweetiest of all sweetie pies, Little Miss Broadway.

December 13, 2008

Gilmore Girls

Jackson: You name the fruit, it’ll be in one of her pies.

December 12, 2008

The Simpsons

Mr. Burns (to Homer): Play along, chubsy … there’s a pie in it for you.

December 11, 2008

Reaper

Sock: I’m going to go in there and talk to Mrs. Carmona. Sweet little Mrs. Carmona … (wistfully) see if she has any more pie.

December 10, 2008

Pushing Daisies

Emerson: You know, you gotta peel back that piecrust you workin’ under and turn on the news sometime.

December 9, 2008

Moviefone.com, on why you should see Waitress instead of Pirates of the Caribbean:

Who needs hot pirates when you've got hot pies?

December 8, 2008

Twin Peaks



Log Lady: This cherry pie is a miracle.

December 7, 2008

"A Better Brew," by Burkhard Bilger, in The New Yorker

Dan Calagione, owner of Dogfish Head Brewery: ... I'm frustrated that one beer has been hammered down people's throats. I mean, banana cream pie may be your favorite fucking food. But if you ate banana cream pie every day you would hate it, too.

December 6, 2008

Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog

Penny: Sometimes people are layered like that. There's something totally different underneath than what's on the surface.

Dr. Horrible/Billy: And sometimes there's a third even deeper level. And that one is the same as the top, surface level.

Penny: Huh?

Dr. H/Billy: Like with pie.

December 5, 2008

Whoopi Goldberg: We'd sit backstage and talk about names we'd never give our children, like Pork Pie or Independence. Of course, now people are walking around with those names.

December 4, 2008

Winter's Tale, by Mark Helprin

p. 552: Thousands of tents were pitched on the ice, rivaling the snow palaces …. Roasted meats, hot drinks, and fragrant fruit pies that were baked in brick ovens which had been built on the ice, were everywhere and cheap.

December 3, 2008

T 4 2, by Lee Glickstein and Nancy Salomon, in Tougher Tuesday Crosswords

25 Down: Pies in the sky?
Answer: UFOs

December 2, 2008

Waitress

Jenna: We make all the pies there fresh … breakfast pies, dinner pies. Twenty-seven different varieties of pie. And a new one that I create every day.

December 1, 2008

Pushing Daisies

Olive: Counter-intelligence via pie delivery. Like gossiping with a purpose.